


All Your Base Are Belong To Voldemort

by Ninna



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Humor, Mash-up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-04-15
Updated: 2001-04-15
Packaged: 2017-10-22 13:25:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/238492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ninna/pseuds/Ninna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Voldemort attacks Hogwarts and the infamous mistranslation from the video game Zero Wing attacks the readers. Welcome to the memes of 2001.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All Your Base Are Belong To Voldemort

All Your Base Are Belong To Us

In A.D. 1995  
War was beginning...

All the Hogwarts students were assembled in the Great Hall for the term-starting festivities. The Sorting of new students had just completed, when suddenly a large explosion could be seen through the sky-mirroring roof of the Great Hall.

Professor Dumbledore had started into his annual speech, when he stopped suddenly. "What happened?"

The Gryffindor table was all abuzz with excitement. Ron elbowed Harry. "Someone set us up the bomb."

A flurry of post owls entered the hall. "It looks like a signal," Professor McGonagall commented.

"What!" Dumbledore was quite taken aback by the whole turn of events. "Is there any way to make our view of the sky a bit brighter, so we can see what's going on outside?"

Professor Snape rolled his eyes and pointed his wand toward the ceiling. "Main screen turn on." The sky brightened slightly. An eerie shape looking somewhat like a cross between a man and a snake formed out of the smoke of the explosion.

"It's you!" Dumbledore cried. "It's Voldemort!" The worried children sat stiff in their seats.

"How are you gentlemen!" Voldemort's voice boomed. "All your base are belong to us." Everyone looked up to see the ghastly display of verbal aggression. "You are on your way to destruction."

"What are you saying!" No one had seen Dumbledore look this worried before.

"You have no chance to survive. Make your time. Ha ha ha ha..." Voldemort cackled. The cloud-shape faded out, leaving a clear blue night sky once more.

Dumbledore turned to McGonagall. "Is the 'Zig Project' you and Hagrid have been working on ready?"

"Yes, the dragons have all been transfigured into flying armored assault vehicles, yet keeping some of their original qualities as well." She looked ready for the coming battle.

Dumbledore gave the battle cry. "Take off every 'Zig'." He looked at McGonagall once more. "You know what you're doing." Once more he cried out to the assembled crowd. "Move 'Zig' for great justice."

**Author's Note:**

> Note from 2011: So I've been writing horrible parodies for a decade. I'm willing to claim this under my current pseud. The Harry Potter self-insert challenge fic I also have at ff.net can go die. In a fire. Probably the one lit under the stove in the original Harvest Moon.
> 
> Original note from 2001: Yes, I know the original Zero Wing mistranslation had much worse grammar, but I couldn't bring myself to do that. If you want to see the game clip that started this all, head on over to Zany Video Game Quotes. I realize this meme is almost dead, but it looks like no one here at fanfiction.net has succumbed, and I had promised some people at one of the boards I frequent that I'd write this up...at the end of February. Thank you for reading this far, and remember that if you review, a winner is you, _and_ if anyone could confirm the origin of fire for me, I'd appreciate that.


End file.
